Heart of Diamonds got a four-star review at J. Kaye's Book Blog. Among other things, J.Kaye said,
"...one of the most positive aspects of the book was Donelson’s realistic portrayal of the main characters and the warlike conditions in Africa."For links to more reviews, visit www.heartofdiamonds.com.
The Pulitzer flags should be flying over Lynn Nottage's acclaimed play, Ruined, which I saw recently during its NY run. The play exposes the horrors of terror rape in the Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC) through the stories of victims of the crime.
Nottage chose to write a play about the strife in the Congo much the same way I was drawn into the crisis with Heart of Diamonds. She started out to write something else--in her case, an adaptation of Bertolt Brecht's Mother Courage--but was compelled by the reality of the modern tragedy in the DRC to create an entirely different work. The world should be thankful she made that choice.
Ruined centers on Mama Nadi and her tavern cum whorehouse in the Ituri region of the Congo. The stories of Mama Nadi's "girls" are told in a swelling chorus of pathos among a parade of soldiers, rebels, miners, and traders who show up looking for relief from the violence wracking the countryside.
Each of the women tells a story of how they were victimized by the conflict. Josephine (played by Cherise Boothe), the daughter of a village chief, had been cast adrift when the social structure of her homeland was destroyed by war over the region's mineral wealth. Salima (Quincy Tyler Bernstine) was snatched by rebels and used as a sex slave for five months before she returned to her village, only to be rejected by her husband and family.
The plot revolves around Sophie (Condola Rashad), who was "ruined" by a gang of rebels who mutilated her genitals in an act of terror rape all too common in the Congo today. Rashad's performance perfectly captures the tragic effects of the crime. Her sweetly innocent face contrasts sharply with the awkward way her body moves in response to the constant pain from her injuries.
In an telling touch, most of the soldiers, rebels, and miners are played by the same cast members in alternating roles, emphasizing the shifting nature of loyalties and alliances in the real conflict playing out today in the Congo.
Mama Nadi is the star of the play and Saidah Arrika Ekulona portrays her as a flamboyant, strong-willed survivor, hard-crusted but soft-hearted, a woman for the ages. Her bravery in the face of the ever-heightening violence is the pillar that supports the entire play.
The emotional climax comes early in the second act (in a scene that reminded me greatly of Ogastine's story in Heart of Diamonds) when Salima delivers a soliloquy about her horrific experience. The audience literally gasped when she described the details of her capture, then you could hear them squirming uncomfortably as she told how she was used as a sex slave. The theater was struck silent when she related her return to her village expecting succor only to be given the back of the hand and driven away by her husband.
The heart-wrenching, mind-stopping production premiered last fall at Chicago's Goodman Theatre and moved to Manhattan Theater Club's Stage 1 at City Center (where I saw it) this month for a limited time. The run in New York has been extended, but it will probably end soon, so I strongly recommend you order tickets today.
Dave Donelson, author of Heart of Diamonds a romantic thriller about blood diamonds in the Congo.
I heard recently from a friend I made at the January 17 Congo Peace Rally in Washington:
Hello Dave,
It was great meeting you in Washington D.C.
I’ve just finished reading your book, Heart of Diamonds. It was a great read which I thoroughly enjoyed. Fast paced and a very exciting finish. I enjoyed the evangelist/corporate connections lurking throughout the novel. I also saw your write-up on the rally in D.C. Thanks for including Osaka!
I’m slowly moving forward with my blog Stealth Conflicts, and have just started a Stealth Conflicts Forum, which is opened up to those interested to write posts on the subject. I’m also planning a photo exhibition/talk on the situation in the DRC with a photojournalist friend.
Keep up the pressure and ‘be strong’!
All the best,
Virgil
Dave Donelson, author of Heart of Diamonds a romantic thriller about blood diamonds in the Congo.
Multinational war is heightening the world's worst humanitarian crisis, the on-going struggle over the riches in the Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC). I will be discussing the latest bizarre developments in Congo at the Chappaqua Library, 195 South Greeley Street, Chappaqua, NY, at 7:30 PM, Wednesday, February 11.
I'll also be reading from Heart of Diamonds, my novel based on the Congo's endless struggle, and displaying some of the photos I took in Central Africa while researching the book.
Since my last appearance (a well-attended program at the Scarsdale Library in early December), two foreign armies have marched onto Congolese soil and the already-dire situation has become even more dangerous for the civilian population. The region's fate is balanced on ever-shifting alliances and a teetering democracy.
For a brief look at the situation in the Congo today, visit my Heart of Diamonds blog.
Dave Donelson, author of Heart of Diamonds a romantic thriller about blood diamonds in the Congo
Media is one thing, but medical science has changed the sexual attitudes in the suburbs, too. Just look at Viagra. It’s hard to believe, but the little blue pill that launched a million jokes and a gazillion pieces of spam celebrated its tenth birthday this year.
Yes, sildenafil citrate, more popularly known as Viagra, the comedian’s best friend, was approved by the FDA to treat erectile dysfunction in 1999. Thousands of marriages were saved—and probably tens of thousands destroyed—as more than 30 million men lined up for prescriptions and millions more took it without benefit of a doctor’s advice. The AARP declared that Viagra is as significant as the birth control pill that launched the first sexual revolution some 30 years earlier.
A recent AARP study reported that 36% of men 60-69 have intercourse once a week versus 24% of women in the same age group. How do experts explain the discrepancy? Filewich says, “There are a lot more older guys out there cruising for young chicks.”
Another thing that has changed is the ease with which those older guys—and younger people of both sexes—can find like-minded pleasure-seekers. Forget pick-up bars—now it’s all arranged online.
“Adult Friend Finder (www.aff.com) is a big thing,” reports Q, a medical technician who finds pleasure with various partners during her off hours. “I’ve met lots of swingers from Westchester, men who cheat on their wives, guys who are just looking for basic relationships.”I did a quick check of Westchester listings on the website and found hundreds. Q, a woman in her late twenties who lives in the southeastern part of the county, says she prefers to look for partners online because it’s anonymously discreet and, once both people are comfortable with their online relationship, they can move on to a physical one.
“I’ve found people are looking for variety, not the same old boring thing all the time in bed—the man on top, over in five minutes, do it every Tuesday,” Q explains. “Dressing up, using cuffs, role playing, living out a fantasy, including a third or even a fourth person—people really like variety.”Even in Westchester.
Media today, be it the Internet, TV, shock radio, or even billboards, seem to some to be no more than one long smut fest. Observes Dr. Robert Filewich:
“You now have KY Jelly advertised so you can ‘have a more intimate relationship’ with your partner. Whoever thought that would be on TV?”Ads like that one used to appear only in magazines delivered in plain brown wrappers. Now we can hear similar spots for the Romantic Depot, Westchester’s one and only mature-shoppers-only retailer, on local radio. The store, squeezed into a specially-zoned section of Elmsford, NY, next to the I-287 on-ramp, mostly sells DVDs, but about a third of the floor space is devoted to toys like the “rabbit”, a vibrator with two protrusions. The most expensive model has numerous settings and sells for $228. Bondage items like furry handcuffs, leather straps for every part of your body, paddles, whips, bed restraints have their own section, as does edible underwear. The store has a small foyer with display windows and a much larger 18-and-over room in the back where you can buy your own pole-dancing kit in a tube for $229, which comes complete with a telescoping pole, garter, and instructional DVD. The package carries a helpful warning just like the one on dry cleaner bags: “this is not a children’s toy.”
“Men come in looking for better erections,” says Michael Werner, MD, a urologist who also oversees the Medical Center for Female Sexuality. “It’s not my job to make sure they are only using them with their wife.” He hastens to add, “Monogamy is the ideal, but it’s not always the norm.”Maybe not always, but mostly. According to a study by The University of Chicago's National Opinion Research Center, sexual activity is 25 percent to 300 percent greater for married couples versus the non-married, depending on age. In case you were wondering, the study says married couples between ages 18 and 29 have sexual relations an average of nearly 112 times per year. That rate steadily decreases (but doesn’t disappear!) with age, so that married couples aged 70 and older have sex 16 times a year on average.
“We don’t do it as often as we did before the kids came along,” R says, “but it’s more from lack of opportunity than lack of desire.”She is a young part-time paralegal with two children in school; her husband, T, works in the banking industry. She adds,
“Why would either one of us want to mess up our marriage and our children’s lives when we make each other happy as it is?”Few developments have affected our sexual lives as much as the Internet, where “WWW” is inextricably tied to “XXX.” There’s nothing new about pornography, of course. You can find it on ancient Greek pottery and probably on cave walls somewhere. But what’s changed is how easy it is to find online. As Werner pointed out, “It used to be that the only way you could see people having sex was to go to one of those movie theaters where you wore a raincoat. Today, you can accidentally click a link and end up with a porn site.”
The eleventh annual African-American Writers & Readers Literary Tea was an event even more special than usual this year. It's always the highlight of Martin Luther King's birthday celebration in Westchester County, but it held special significance this year since it was held the day before the inauguration of Barack Obama as President of the United States.
Speakers included event Chair Toni Cox Burns, Honorary Chair Cherl Brannan, President & CEO of Sister to Sister International, and Host Melvin Burruss, President of the African-American Men of Westchester. Terry Kirchner, the newly-appointed Director of the Westchester Library System, said a few words after the program, which was presented in association with the Westchester County Chapter of The Links, Inc.
Appearing were Asha Bandele, poet and memorist who read from Something Like Beautiful, Tonya Bolden, who read from MLK Journey of a King, and popular novelist Kimberla Lawson Roby, author of The Best of Everything.
The Tea was the first event of a year-long celebration of the Westchester Library System's fiftieth anniversary. Funds raised are used to support African-American collections at the system's 38 member libraries.
Dave Donelson, author of Heart of Diamonds a romantic thriller about blood diamonds in the Congo
Looking for love in all the wrong places used to mean hanging out in bars and clubs, but suburbia’s bustling office complexes are teeming with match-seekers, too. I was told by G, a mid-forties entrepreneur, about one small business with about 30 employees where the 20-25% fooling around factor may be conservative.
Company sex isn’t the only variety, of course, nor is it strictly one-on-one in staid, buttoned-up Westchester County. Bob and Carol and Ted and Alice, a 1969 movie about various combinations among two married couples, would be tame compared to some of the social functions reportedly held behind closed doors in Westchester.
“I know a woman who was deejaying a private party for swingers,” M (a hairdresser) says. “She told me she was not prepared for half the things she saw. We left it at that!”Dr. Bat Sheva Marcus, a sex therapist, says the swinging scene is nothing new.
“Bondage, SM, swinging, nudism, all that stuff’s been going on for ages. People were having key parties in the ‘70s.” She tells of one woman who got into swinging with her husband, enjoyed it for a couple of years, but then grew kind of tired of the whole thing. She said she couldn’t stop, though, because her entire social circle was based on swinging. Marcus explains, “She told me she had met the loveliest people and she didn’t want to lose their friendship.”Read more about Suburban Sex in this seven-part series.
Suburban media maven Hezi Aris recently invited me to appear on his WVOX-AM program, "On The Level With Hezi Aria" to discuss events in the Congo and Heart of Diamonds. An mp3 version of the program is available for download at Hezi's NY Times-recognized blog, Yonkers Tribune.
Dave Donelson, author of Heart of Diamonds a romantic thriller about blood diamonds in the Congo.
Not everybody in the suburbs is into sex toy parties, strip tease aerobics, or even fooling around. It’s not like every third person you see walking through the Westchester Mall is a hot-to-trot, pill-popping sex maniac. Even if the total number of Westchester, NY, residents with infidelity on the brain is close to the national average, the vast majority of us are not cheating on our partners. Even fewer of us are swinging or looking for cheap thrills perched on a bar stool ogling a stripper.
Consider B, married to D (his second wife) for 15 years. They have two kids, a beagle, and a hamster named Cubby, all living in a center-hall colonial in southeastern Westchester. He and his wife live what they say is a perfectly happy life that includes completely satisfactory sex with each other and only with each other. Their friends, they say, do too.
“People like to talk about all this stuff, but it’s not going on in my neighborhood,” B observes. “I don’t know a single person who’s cheating on their wife or husband. Never been to a key party or know anybody who has.” He then adds, “I also don’t like to talk about my relationship with my wife, but I can assure you that we’re quite happy in that department. Maybe we’re boring, but I believe most people are just like us.”Dr. Robert Filewich, director of The Center for Behavior Therapy in White Plains, NY, says B is probably right.
“On average, people here have good healthy sex.”Most other experts agree. In a national survey of over 650 married couples, approximately two-thirds of the husbands and wives reported a "a great deal" (or more) sexual satisfaction in their marriage. Similarly, the majority (over 80 percent) of married or cohabiting respondents in another study stated that they were "extremely" or "very" physically and emotionally satisfied by sexual activity with their partner.
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